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Blood Bytes: Favorite True Blood quotes – Episode 3.10 – “I Smell A Rat”

Mary Jo (aka Skimom2) has provided her weekly list of the best True Blood quotes below:

I smell a rat and I think its Eric Northman! And Sookie, when are you going to learn not to be so dumb and naive? Lafayette and Jesus made me dizzy on their little “V” trip. OK enough said, but unfortunately there wasn’t enough interesting dialogue either his week. But I still love the show and hope they win some Emmys!

Pam to Eric- ” Blah, blah, vampire emergency, blah!”

Sookie to Bill- “I’m a fairy? How fucking lame!”

Tara to Franklin’s remains– “I hope you rot in hell you psycho piece of shit!”

Sookie to Bill- “If my blood is so delicious, does that mean your feelings for me are based on that?”
Bill to Sookie
– “No! Though it definitely drew me to you at first [cue Sookie and Bill love theme]. Sookie … it is not your blood I love. I love YOU. Your mind, your heart, your soul. And I will forswear ever feeding on you again if that’s what it takes to convince you of that. You have brought light back into my life. And hope. And gratitude. That is why I love you. Nothing else.”

Eric to Yvetta- “Are you mentally competent and under no duress at this time?”

Eric to Yvetta (in Russian)?-  “I promised you a job and good sex.”

Lafayette to Jesus (referring to Calvin and Crystal)– ” Them fuckers are a whole new dimension of trash.”

Bill to Eric– “You should know, you’re his butt boy.”

Bill to Eric (referring to Russell)– ” That’s why he went medieval on TV!”

Steve Newlin on TV– “And if I were less than Christian I would say told ya!”

Jessica to Arlene– “We get it! You don’t like vampires. Well I don’t like narrow minded skinny bitches with bad dye jobs!’

Arlene to Jessica– “I may be skinny but I’m not evil and once evil always evil!’

Jessica to Tommy–  “I shouldn’ve done that!”
Tommy to Jessica– “Oh, ya kiddin, you gave me total wood!”

Summer to Hoyt (Bear)– “I can tell your a sexual person Hoyt Fortenberry!”

Summer to Hoyt (while his hand is on her boob) – “Its gonna take gettin used to me being warm and all.”

Lafayette to Jesus (about doing “V”) – “Yesterday you made coffee. Today I thought we graduate to juice and

Newscaster on TV (talking about Russell’s mansion)– “Sources say the mansion was as empty as a tomb. No pun intended!”

Sam to Tommy–  “Tommy, its not respect when your employees think your a psychopath!”
Tommy to Sam–  “All I know is that I was proud of my big brother last night!”
Sam to Tommy– “Yeah- well you’re an idiot!”

Sookie to Eric-“I know this is a dream.”
Eric to Sookie– “You might as well enjoy it then!”

Pam to Sookie (entering Eric’s office) – “She insisted!”
Eric to Pam– “She always does!”

Sookie to Eric– “OK I get it. I’m irresistible and intoxicating.”

Pam to Eric– “Blah, blah, vampire emergency, blah!”

Jessica to Hoyt– “Hoyt I love you now drink my blood!”

Jason (when he sees Crystal shifting from a panther)– “Mama!”

Russell to Tony– “I’m so sorry Talbot!”
Tony to Russell– ” Tony!”
Tony to Russell– ” Yeah it was a nice house.”

7 Comment responses

  1. Avatar
    August 24, 2010

    Great list Mary Jo as always. I thin Pam will be the most memorable.
    Blah blah

    I did love Bill’s declaration of love. And Hoyt’s as well.


  2. Avatar
    August 24, 2010

    Great list, Mary Jo. Just one little nit-pickin’ thing. Your misuse of ‘your’ vs. ‘you’re’ drives me crazy, ;).

    Sam to Tommy- “Yeah- well your an idiot!”
    Bill to Eric- “You should know, your his butt boy.”


    • Avatar
      August 24, 2010

      OK, you’re either a teacher, or a virgo, or both!


  3. Avatar
    August 24, 2010

    Wonderful work as always, Mary Jo. A couple of additions:

    2003 Flashback Sam (to his female accomplice): “A man ain’t nothing without his secrets.”

    Lafayette to Jesus: “So you’re more like a shaman in a Sunday hat.”

    I, too, appreciated Bill’s declaration of love. And Hoyt’s to Jessica was a close second.


  4. Avatar
    August 24, 2010

    great quotes Mary Jo, thanks for sharing!


    “Who is the biggest rat in Sookie’s life: the one she knows about or the one she doesn’t?”

    yep, that’s right.


  5. Avatar
    August 24, 2010

    Love your list. My favorite: “blah, blah, vampire emergency, blah!

    Also loved Sam’s delivery of “well, you’re an idiot!”


  6. Avatar
    August 24, 2010

    Sweet ol’ Terry with the proof that he’s reading up on pregnancy:

    “Are you spotting grayish tissue, having side cramps, or experiencing a dull, consistent ache in your lower back?”


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