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Season 5 Best Quotations

Season 5 Best Quotations


Below are the quotes that we think can “stand on their own” and could be used over and over, even outside True Blood.


Below is our top quotes from Episode 5.02 – “The Authority Always Wins”


Jason: That’s getting to eat the pie without having to pay for the cow.

Steve Newlin: I still talk to God every night. I talked to him this evening as a matter of fact, and I’m here to tell you, Jesus Loves Vampires.

Steve Newlin: I’ve just realized that I’ve found God’s true light in the darkness.

Dieter Braun: We were created in God’s image, not humans.

Dieter Braun: And their flesh shall nourish yours; their blood shall flow within you for as the beetle nourishes the lark so shall human nourish vampire.

Maxine: Thank you for splitting my boy from that red haired slut; I’m gonna bake you a pie.

Roman: We swear fealty to the Blood and the Progenitor. The First, The Last, the Eternal, Lord and Lilith, Father and Mother, protect us as we protect you, from this day until the hour of true death…And in Lord and Lilith’s name we say…Vampyr.


Below is our top quotes from Episode 5.01 – “Turn, Turn, Turn”

Bill: My Palace is your Palace, within reason, of course.

Pam:  Color me impressed, you guys know how to party!

Pam: I can’t be the only one noticing that she’s missing half her head, can I?  Even if I tried, what’s to say she won’t rise up out of the ground tomorrow night completely fucktarded.

Pam: I am wearing a Walmart sweatsuit for y’all.  If that’s not a demonstration of team spirit I don’t know what is.

Jason: This dog, don’t bark that way.

Bill:  I’d keep the noise down in there, New Orleans is only 60 miles away.

Eric: We fight like siblings, but we fuck like champions.

Jessica:  People who go to college become big and powerful, right? I already am, so why do all that work?

Eric: Ike Applebaum?

Vampire Authority voice: In the name of the one true Vampire Authority in who’s wisdom and justice all is made manifest by God, do not fucking move.

Pam: There is dirt in my bra.

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